Holding Patterns

It is 9am on Saturday and it's just me here. It is very quiet in the ICU this morning - quite peaceful. This is the first time I've stayed the night here and to be honest with you, I had a great night - it was just what Joel, Mat and I needed. We are all here day in and day out - eating, praying, living, excited about wiggled toes and upward thumbs, and worried about our friend. It seems as though we are all living our regular lives in between trips to Harborview or between our 'Liam updates.' To a certain extent, our lives are in a holding pattern and frankly, it is quite difficult to think about anything else these days. Joel and I had a talk the other night about the state of life and of our friends and we came up with the most cliche thing we could have possibly come up with (but it is certainly true). Liam wants us to live our lives and not live in these holding patterns. He knows we're here, he really does, but he wants Erika to go home an sleep (which she's doing), Joel to buy a motorcycle, Katie to nail her interview, etc. Taking this into consideration, Joel, Mat and I walked to a bar for a beer last night. It was a break from the norm and we all felt a bit weird about going to a bar, but it was just what the 3 of needed. It was a nice release to sit outside the confines of the ICU and talk about everything that is going on. We laughed, we cried, and we even drank something made up that we called a 'Manny bomb.' Ask mat about this, he can explain. We blew off steam, recharged, and had a little bit of a group therapy session.

The ICU waiting area was quite alive when we got back, everyone was awake and chatting about the days highs and lows. We caught up with everyone, but then marched into Liam's room to tell him all about our night. He was happy to see us and hear about it. He was quite responsive and aware of us.

**Ok, here is the Liam update as of this morning (the reason you all read this blog)**

He had a quiet night and a good morning. Mat just woke me up before leaving with some great news. He spent about a half hour with Liam this morning and said that he half opened his eyes (about as much as my hung over eyes would open - according to Mat). Mat said that through his half open eyes he tried looking at him and focusing but then closed his eyes and didn't open them again. After Mat left I went in to see Liam and when he woke up he opened his eyes and looked at me! I was asking him questions and he was nodding yes or no to answer me. This is so exciting. I asked him if he could see me, and he shook his head yes. I asked him if he was comfortable and he shook his head yes. The nurse had turned on CNN because she said he indicated he wanted to hear the news. I asked him about the tv and if it was too loud and he pointed at the tv and then he pointed down. I asked him if he wanted me to turn the volume down and he nodded yes!! He is very responsive and the nurse said he is coming along much faster than they thought he would! I asked him if he felt tired and he said yes, so I let him rest and am heading home now to get some rest of my own.

Today we are back to the holding pattern. We eat, we pray, we live, we get excited about open eyes and nodding, and we worry about our friend. This will be a long road and we don't want to burn out after the first mile. As long as we all take care of ourselves, support each other, and try to regain some of the normalcy of everyday life, we'll be here and ready for anything that comes our way. Mornings like today go a long way in reassuring us that Liam is fighting through this like a champion.