About a month ago Liam help Brian Lindgren - a family friend and the father of Liam's friend John move - loading and emptying the U-haul truck. When Brian left from visiting today he said to Liam"You'll have to help me unload another U-haul soon" and Liam cracked a smile!
Frank Hogenhout (another family friend and Mark or Hoagies father) was here today and he told me that he is ordained to do weddings now. I told Liam, while he was standing here, that when Liam is a little better Frank in going to come back and marry us and Liam nodded his head yes. So, I guess were engaged now;) not quite the proposal I wanted...but I'll take it :)
Saturday, February 28, 2009
He's awake!!
He's awake and knows what's going on. He nods yes and no to tell me what he wants. He points at things to let me know what he needs. For example, he was pointing away from him and I was able to figure out that he was wanted the blanket off because he was hot. I then asked if he wanted a fan on him and he nodded yes. I asked him earlier if he knew who I was an he nodded yes and nodded that he knew I was Erika. I had to ask to make sure he wasn't just being nice:) He just "asked" me to turn on the TV and now he is back asleep. At least now I know he is still normal in there, first thing is he's hot and he wants to watch TV :) Now that's my Liam:) He's still got a long way to go, but he's doing so much better. James was here earlier and Liam was giving him a couple big thumbs up. James left a couple soccer balls and some permanant markers and paint pens. Next time you stop by, please sign the soccer balls for him. This was Chris Michael's idea from what James said and I love it. My blogs are going to be short, cause he keeps waking up all the time and I want to only pay attention to him when he is awake, but I just want all of you to know how great he is doing. I guess no more haging out in the waiting room, we have to hang out in his room now that he is awake more!
Holding Patterns
It is 9am on Saturday and it's just me here. It is very quiet in the ICU this morning - quite peaceful. This is the first time I've stayed the night here and to be honest with you, I had a great night - it was just what Joel, Mat and I needed. We are all here day in and day out - eating, praying, living, excited about wiggled toes and upward thumbs, and worried about our friend. It seems as though we are all living our regular lives in between trips to Harborview or between our 'Liam updates.' To a certain extent, our lives are in a holding pattern and frankly, it is quite difficult to think about anything else these days. Joel and I had a talk the other night about the state of life and of our friends and we came up with the most cliche thing we could have possibly come up with (but it is certainly true). Liam wants us to live our lives and not live in these holding patterns. He knows we're here, he really does, but he wants Erika to go home an sleep (which she's doing), Joel to buy a motorcycle, Katie to nail her interview, etc. Taking this into consideration, Joel, Mat and I walked to a bar for a beer last night. It was a break from the norm and we all felt a bit weird about going to a bar, but it was just what the 3 of needed. It was a nice release to sit outside the confines of the ICU and talk about everything that is going on. We laughed, we cried, and we even drank something made up that we called a 'Manny bomb.' Ask mat about this, he can explain. We blew off steam, recharged, and had a little bit of a group therapy session.
The ICU waiting area was quite alive when we got back, everyone was awake and chatting about the days highs and lows. We caught up with everyone, but then marched into Liam's room to tell him all about our night. He was happy to see us and hear about it. He was quite responsive and aware of us.
**Ok, here is the Liam update as of this morning (the reason you all read this blog)**
He had a quiet night and a good morning. Mat just woke me up before leaving with some great news. He spent about a half hour with Liam this morning and said that he half opened his eyes (about as much as my hung over eyes would open - according to Mat). Mat said that through his half open eyes he tried looking at him and focusing but then closed his eyes and didn't open them again. After Mat left I went in to see Liam and when he woke up he opened his eyes and looked at me! I was asking him questions and he was nodding yes or no to answer me. This is so exciting. I asked him if he could see me, and he shook his head yes. I asked him if he was comfortable and he shook his head yes. The nurse had turned on CNN because she said he indicated he wanted to hear the news. I asked him about the tv and if it was too loud and he pointed at the tv and then he pointed down. I asked him if he wanted me to turn the volume down and he nodded yes!! He is very responsive and the nurse said he is coming along much faster than they thought he would! I asked him if he felt tired and he said yes, so I let him rest and am heading home now to get some rest of my own.
Today we are back to the holding pattern. We eat, we pray, we live, we get excited about open eyes and nodding, and we worry about our friend. This will be a long road and we don't want to burn out after the first mile. As long as we all take care of ourselves, support each other, and try to regain some of the normalcy of everyday life, we'll be here and ready for anything that comes our way. Mornings like today go a long way in reassuring us that Liam is fighting through this like a champion.
The ICU waiting area was quite alive when we got back, everyone was awake and chatting about the days highs and lows. We caught up with everyone, but then marched into Liam's room to tell him all about our night. He was happy to see us and hear about it. He was quite responsive and aware of us.
**Ok, here is the Liam update as of this morning (the reason you all read this blog)**
He had a quiet night and a good morning. Mat just woke me up before leaving with some great news. He spent about a half hour with Liam this morning and said that he half opened his eyes (about as much as my hung over eyes would open - according to Mat). Mat said that through his half open eyes he tried looking at him and focusing but then closed his eyes and didn't open them again. After Mat left I went in to see Liam and when he woke up he opened his eyes and looked at me! I was asking him questions and he was nodding yes or no to answer me. This is so exciting. I asked him if he could see me, and he shook his head yes. I asked him if he was comfortable and he shook his head yes. The nurse had turned on CNN because she said he indicated he wanted to hear the news. I asked him about the tv and if it was too loud and he pointed at the tv and then he pointed down. I asked him if he wanted me to turn the volume down and he nodded yes!! He is very responsive and the nurse said he is coming along much faster than they thought he would! I asked him if he felt tired and he said yes, so I let him rest and am heading home now to get some rest of my own.
Today we are back to the holding pattern. We eat, we pray, we live, we get excited about open eyes and nodding, and we worry about our friend. This will be a long road and we don't want to burn out after the first mile. As long as we all take care of ourselves, support each other, and try to regain some of the normalcy of everyday life, we'll be here and ready for anything that comes our way. Mornings like today go a long way in reassuring us that Liam is fighting through this like a champion.
Friday, February 27, 2009
Visiting
For eveyone that has been wanting to come by that I haven't gotten back to, please feel free to stop by over the weekend. I will be here most of the time and would love the company.
Missing Liam
He's looking okay, basically the same. Still improving just a little bit at a time, but not too much new to report. He's responding better to commands then before, faster response and stronger on the left. He's moving so much with his right hand that the continuout movement is causing some chafing on his legs where his arm is rubbing so he has to wear what looks like a boxing glove and a thick sleeve to keep him from making it worse.
As I mentioned beore, he is not sedated anymore, but his brain is injured, so while he is concious, he is not awake. I don't really know how to explain it, becuase I don't fully understand it. He's aware on some level as he can respond to commands and stimulous. But, his brain needs more time to recover, it's just not ready to be awake. Sorry, I don't understand it better then that.
I had a chance to talk with a rehab doctor today. It sound like they are going to start sending some rehab people to work with him tomorrow. Just very basic, moving his joints and range of montion. It's a start. The doctor told me there are two paths re can take from here. If he imporves fast, has enough endurance, and can remember things he learned the day before then he can move to the 4th floor here and have intense therapy - 3 hours a day - 1 hour each of physicial, occupational, and speech - depending of course on what his needs are. This would last about 3 to 4 weeks and then he would hopefully come home. If he isn't ready for this, they he will be transfered to a rehab facilty where he will still get therapy, but not as intense, one hour a day or every other day. They can't make this decsion until he is more awake and they can see what level of therapy he can tolerate.
One of the main reasons he is still in ICU has to do with his breahting. He is still producing large amounts of secretions and has to be suctioned regularly. Until he can clear his airway himself and keep his oxygen saturation high enough he needs to stay in the ICU.
I had a much needed break today thanks to Chris and Lindsey and Kiea took the day off and took care of me and the house. It's really hard to leave here, leaving Liam. I just want to crawl in to bed with him and hold him and make it all better. But I can't, i can't fix it, and that is just so hard to accept. I miss him alot. I mean he's here physically which I am so thankful for, but I miss him. I miss his attitiude, I miss his jokes, I miss talking with him. He's my best friend, and eveything feels empty and wierd. Plus, I let my parents take the dogs which make life easier on me, but the house feels empty. I think what scares me the most is not knowing if he will be Liam when he wakes up, or if his personality will have changed.
As I mentioned beore, he is not sedated anymore, but his brain is injured, so while he is concious, he is not awake. I don't really know how to explain it, becuase I don't fully understand it. He's aware on some level as he can respond to commands and stimulous. But, his brain needs more time to recover, it's just not ready to be awake. Sorry, I don't understand it better then that.
I had a chance to talk with a rehab doctor today. It sound like they are going to start sending some rehab people to work with him tomorrow. Just very basic, moving his joints and range of montion. It's a start. The doctor told me there are two paths re can take from here. If he imporves fast, has enough endurance, and can remember things he learned the day before then he can move to the 4th floor here and have intense therapy - 3 hours a day - 1 hour each of physicial, occupational, and speech - depending of course on what his needs are. This would last about 3 to 4 weeks and then he would hopefully come home. If he isn't ready for this, they he will be transfered to a rehab facilty where he will still get therapy, but not as intense, one hour a day or every other day. They can't make this decsion until he is more awake and they can see what level of therapy he can tolerate.
One of the main reasons he is still in ICU has to do with his breahting. He is still producing large amounts of secretions and has to be suctioned regularly. Until he can clear his airway himself and keep his oxygen saturation high enough he needs to stay in the ICU.
I had a much needed break today thanks to Chris and Lindsey and Kiea took the day off and took care of me and the house. It's really hard to leave here, leaving Liam. I just want to crawl in to bed with him and hold him and make it all better. But I can't, i can't fix it, and that is just so hard to accept. I miss him alot. I mean he's here physically which I am so thankful for, but I miss him. I miss his attitiude, I miss his jokes, I miss talking with him. He's my best friend, and eveything feels empty and wierd. Plus, I let my parents take the dogs which make life easier on me, but the house feels empty. I think what scares me the most is not knowing if he will be Liam when he wakes up, or if his personality will have changed.
Living in the ICU Waiting Room
Good Morning Everyone,
Liam had a quiet night. He is still getting agitated and his breathing problems remain, but he's stable. And that's good. He's having problems controlling his airway, and the nurses need to suction fluids from his throat every couple of hours. Christine, his nurse the last couple of nights, said that this was the main problem keeping him in the ICU. So, keep up that coughing Liam!
Life here is oddly comforting. Harborview Hospital, West Wing, 2nd Floor, Neuro ICU Waiting Room. When Seattle got all that snow in December, Liam mentioned to me that the snow reaffirmed his faith in humanity. He said that, in more difficult times, when peoples cars were stuck and they couldn't get around, they helped each other. Neighbors shoveled neighbors driveways, and strangers talked on the street. Liam loved it, and he especially will appreciate this waiting room.
It could be a horrible place. Families and individuals in limbo, waiting for some improvement in loved ones wrecked with strokes, aneurysms, and traumatic injuries. Every couple of days, a new family arrives. Tears, stress, and fear bleeding out of their faces. But the people pull together.
When we first arrived, we avoided the others. Our own emotions too raw to hear any other stories of pain from our ICU neighbors. They gave us the space that we needed. Everyone understands. But as time passed, everyone here pulls together.
It could be a horrible place, but it's not. Across from where we have set up camp, Randy and his family wait for their grandmother, who suffered a massive stroke Sunday night. All day every day, kids, cousins, and grandkids stop by to share a laugh, a story, or a complaint about one of the other cousins. But the love they all share sets the tone for the room. Next to us is Jim. Jim's wife had an aneurysm 2 weeks ago. He's been here ever since, only going outside for a drink or a cigarette. Once or twice a week, his sister brings a huge home-cooked dinner which he shares with everyone in the room. I haven't caught her name, but another woman is here with her father, a former logging truck driver from Hoquiam, who suffered a stroke as well. He cusses at the nurses and even tried to drag his half-paralyzed body from the bed last night. She is encouraged.
We've all bonded in this place. Good news for one patient is good news for all the families. We all laugh and share stories, and complain together about the surly security guard who told us to be quiet after 10. They never even dim the lights here, so time passes like in a Vegas casino, and it is often much quieter at 12 noon than 12 midnight. But with our laughter and false indignation over trifling complaints, we can help each other forget, if just for a second, why we are all here.
Of course, it's not perfect. Randy flipped out a bit at his family yesterday, and they sent him home to finally get some rest in a real bed. Every once in a while, you look up from your computer, book, puzzle or conversation, and a neighbor is quietly shedding a tear, feeling the fear and stress. Life is real, amplified in this open living room of a house. It's a community, and people care for each other. Like the snowstorm, Liam will appreciate it.
Chris Moose is coming in about an hour to keep an eye on Liam and make sure Erika is taking care of herself. Kelly, Liam's nurse when he got here on Sunday, just stopped by to say hi and see how he is doing. She's encouraged that he's responding to commands. It's nice to know that this isn't just a job for them and that they really care. I've been hugely impressed with the staff here. That's all for now. We'll keep you guys all updated on his improvements.
Liam had a quiet night. He is still getting agitated and his breathing problems remain, but he's stable. And that's good. He's having problems controlling his airway, and the nurses need to suction fluids from his throat every couple of hours. Christine, his nurse the last couple of nights, said that this was the main problem keeping him in the ICU. So, keep up that coughing Liam!
Life here is oddly comforting. Harborview Hospital, West Wing, 2nd Floor, Neuro ICU Waiting Room. When Seattle got all that snow in December, Liam mentioned to me that the snow reaffirmed his faith in humanity. He said that, in more difficult times, when peoples cars were stuck and they couldn't get around, they helped each other. Neighbors shoveled neighbors driveways, and strangers talked on the street. Liam loved it, and he especially will appreciate this waiting room.
It could be a horrible place. Families and individuals in limbo, waiting for some improvement in loved ones wrecked with strokes, aneurysms, and traumatic injuries. Every couple of days, a new family arrives. Tears, stress, and fear bleeding out of their faces. But the people pull together.
When we first arrived, we avoided the others. Our own emotions too raw to hear any other stories of pain from our ICU neighbors. They gave us the space that we needed. Everyone understands. But as time passed, everyone here pulls together.
It could be a horrible place, but it's not. Across from where we have set up camp, Randy and his family wait for their grandmother, who suffered a massive stroke Sunday night. All day every day, kids, cousins, and grandkids stop by to share a laugh, a story, or a complaint about one of the other cousins. But the love they all share sets the tone for the room. Next to us is Jim. Jim's wife had an aneurysm 2 weeks ago. He's been here ever since, only going outside for a drink or a cigarette. Once or twice a week, his sister brings a huge home-cooked dinner which he shares with everyone in the room. I haven't caught her name, but another woman is here with her father, a former logging truck driver from Hoquiam, who suffered a stroke as well. He cusses at the nurses and even tried to drag his half-paralyzed body from the bed last night. She is encouraged.
We've all bonded in this place. Good news for one patient is good news for all the families. We all laugh and share stories, and complain together about the surly security guard who told us to be quiet after 10. They never even dim the lights here, so time passes like in a Vegas casino, and it is often much quieter at 12 noon than 12 midnight. But with our laughter and false indignation over trifling complaints, we can help each other forget, if just for a second, why we are all here.
Of course, it's not perfect. Randy flipped out a bit at his family yesterday, and they sent him home to finally get some rest in a real bed. Every once in a while, you look up from your computer, book, puzzle or conversation, and a neighbor is quietly shedding a tear, feeling the fear and stress. Life is real, amplified in this open living room of a house. It's a community, and people care for each other. Like the snowstorm, Liam will appreciate it.
Chris Moose is coming in about an hour to keep an eye on Liam and make sure Erika is taking care of herself. Kelly, Liam's nurse when he got here on Sunday, just stopped by to say hi and see how he is doing. She's encouraged that he's responding to commands. It's nice to know that this isn't just a job for them and that they really care. I've been hugely impressed with the staff here. That's all for now. We'll keep you guys all updated on his improvements.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Sitting in a "chair"
I don't really know what it is called, some hospital version or a chair where it can go flat and into a chair position. That's what Liam has been sitting in the last couple hours. They lay it flat, put on of those plastic body boards between it and the bed and lift/slide him over on to it. Then they put it in an upright postion and lower his legs so they are at 90 degrees. They put him back to bed a while ago. Marcus came to visit today and went in and said "hey buddy, i hear you give high fives now" and up came Liams hand! He even did thumbs up with his left hand today, once at 4pm. Not the other times, but at least once is better then not at all. He's still breathing no his own and the only medication he is on is haloperidol - a anti-psychotic - to help keep him calm. Basically, he's still getting better:)
Visiting Liam and google calender
Hi Everyone,
First of all, I wanted to say that anyone is welcome to come visit Liam at Harborview anytime (call ahead if after 8 pm, hospital security gets grumpier the later it gets). We've set up camp in the waiting room for the 2nd floor West Hospital, right next to the Neuro wing. For Erika or whoever is at the hospital, it is often a welcome sight to see visitors who also care for Liam.
To help manage this, I've set up a google calender to help Erika keep tabs on when people will be with Liam at the hospital. This doesn't mean you can't just drop by for a quick visit (please do!), and you don't have to add your visit to the calender, but this should make it easier for Erika to decide when she should be there and when she can rest.
I've set it up so that the calender, titled Liam's Watch, is visible to the public. However, to be able to edit the calender and add yourself in, you need to be added. To do this, you need a google calender account. See the steps below to sign up for an account, and then email me that you want to be added, and I'll add you so you can view and edit the calender.
Once you are added, simply create an event, titled with your name, and the dates and times corresponding to your visit. Make sure you add it to Liam's Watch calender and not your own.
Thanks for everyone's help on this. Right now there is almost always someone at the hospital with Liam. Whoever that is always appreciates a visit and if there is a day you can be there, add it to the calender!
Here are the instructions for signing up for google calender:
First of all, I wanted to say that anyone is welcome to come visit Liam at Harborview anytime (call ahead if after 8 pm, hospital security gets grumpier the later it gets). We've set up camp in the waiting room for the 2nd floor West Hospital, right next to the Neuro wing. For Erika or whoever is at the hospital, it is often a welcome sight to see visitors who also care for Liam.
To help manage this, I've set up a google calender to help Erika keep tabs on when people will be with Liam at the hospital. This doesn't mean you can't just drop by for a quick visit (please do!), and you don't have to add your visit to the calender, but this should make it easier for Erika to decide when she should be there and when she can rest.
I've set it up so that the calender, titled Liam's Watch, is visible to the public. However, to be able to edit the calender and add yourself in, you need to be added. To do this, you need a google calender account. See the steps below to sign up for an account, and then email me that you want to be added, and I'll add you so you can view and edit the calender.
Once you are added, simply create an event, titled with your name, and the dates and times corresponding to your visit. Make sure you add it to Liam's Watch calender and not your own.
Thanks for everyone's help on this. Right now there is almost always someone at the hospital with Liam. Whoever that is always appreciates a visit and if there is a day you can be there, add it to the calender!
Here are the instructions for signing up for google calender:
- Go to www.google.com, and click the "more" button on the top toolbar. From the drop-down, select "calender."
- Click the button to "create an account."
- Once you've created and verified your account with google, email me (joelmatsuo@gmail.com) with your email address and that you want to be added to the calender. Once I add you, you can edit the calender to add your visits.
- To add a visit, click "create event," and add your name as the title of the event. Add the times according to your planned schedule, and make sure you add the event to Liam's Watch if you have other google calenders.
- That's all, we should all be able to see when you plan on being there!
Sorry for the late posting
First, the MRI results:
1. there actually isn't very much axon shearing, they were expecting to see more, and this is good.
2. He has some injury to the mid brain - this is called the reticular activity system and controls wakefulness - what this means to Liam's recovery we don't know.
3. the MRI doesn't show everything, there is an unknown amount of microscopic injury throughout his brain that we can't see.
4. there is nothing on the MRI to explain why his left side is weaker - there could maybe be some injury to his motor fibers, but we don't know.
Okay, that is the MRI summary, now let me tell you how he is doing clinically. He's doing really well. He is recovering faster then to doctors expected based on his state when he arrived on the hospital. As I mentioned they did extubate him yesterday and he has been breathing on his own since then. He has been going back and forth in the level of supplemental oxygen that he requires. This has alot to do with teh fact that he is experiencing alot of what they call sympathetic storming. This is basically an uncontrolled state of stress. The syptoms he exhibites include agitation, a drop in blood oxygenation, increases in temperature and heart rate. The episodes don't last very long, and so far he always gets back to a restful state with in 5 or so minutes. Today during neurological exams he has been able to give a thumbs up on comand and raised a couple fingers when asked (all on his right hand - his left moves but is not responding to commands.). He also wiggled all his toes when asked and gave Matty semi high-five when Matty asked him to. He seems to recognize when I am there. When he is awake and I hold his hand or start talking in the room it's like he is trying to get my attention. He starts moving around, turning towards me, open one eye half way, looking in my direction and trying to lift himself up. I could be reading more into it then there is, but it seems like he knows I am around at least on some level.
He may still have to be intubated again, it all depends on his being able to get enough oxygen. His breathing is still very shallow and he is requiring a lot of supplemental oxygen at times. But, for those of you who know what this means, his last blood gas looked good. If not, look it up:) that is your assignment:)
So, as for his prognosis:
We still don't know a lot. When it comes to adult brains and injury regeneration is not possible. What recovery from this type of injury requires is a rewiring of the brain. The hope is that because of the plasticity of the brain healthy parts of the brain can compensate for the damaged parts. We won't know what deficits Liam will have until he is more awake, it's not something they can tell from a scan. For now we focus on the fact that he is recovering faster then expected, doing better then expected, and is moving in the right direction. I think it was Joel who came up with the perfect description for what his recovery will look like "an upward trending roller coaster." There will be ups and down, but what were are looking for is a general upward trend, and so far that is what we are seeing. The surgeon explained to me yesterday that it's very important not to get hung up on his minute to minute changes. I have been following every little change and that has been very stressful. He explained that the important thing is the overall trend and that setbacks are normal.
Thanks for waiting for this post, I was so exhausted yesterday,and by the time we finally talked to the doctor I was not functioning well - Tyler and Kiea forced me to go home and Tyler prescribed some ambien, so I actually got 8 1/2 hours of much needed sleep. It's hard leaving him here, I feel like I am abandoning him, even though know I am doing the right thing since I can't take care of him if I am exhausted or sick. I just want to tell everyone who has been hanging on here or sleeping here thanks. Being alone is hard, and having someone else helps distract me. Also, I can't tell you how much easier it is to leave and get a nap or a shower if I know someone who cares about Liam is sitting here just in case. When one of you is here, I feel like it's okay to get a way for a couple of hours and take care of me. Thanks.
1. there actually isn't very much axon shearing, they were expecting to see more, and this is good.
2. He has some injury to the mid brain - this is called the reticular activity system and controls wakefulness - what this means to Liam's recovery we don't know.
3. the MRI doesn't show everything, there is an unknown amount of microscopic injury throughout his brain that we can't see.
4. there is nothing on the MRI to explain why his left side is weaker - there could maybe be some injury to his motor fibers, but we don't know.
Okay, that is the MRI summary, now let me tell you how he is doing clinically. He's doing really well. He is recovering faster then to doctors expected based on his state when he arrived on the hospital. As I mentioned they did extubate him yesterday and he has been breathing on his own since then. He has been going back and forth in the level of supplemental oxygen that he requires. This has alot to do with teh fact that he is experiencing alot of what they call sympathetic storming. This is basically an uncontrolled state of stress. The syptoms he exhibites include agitation, a drop in blood oxygenation, increases in temperature and heart rate. The episodes don't last very long, and so far he always gets back to a restful state with in 5 or so minutes. Today during neurological exams he has been able to give a thumbs up on comand and raised a couple fingers when asked (all on his right hand - his left moves but is not responding to commands.). He also wiggled all his toes when asked and gave Matty semi high-five when Matty asked him to. He seems to recognize when I am there. When he is awake and I hold his hand or start talking in the room it's like he is trying to get my attention. He starts moving around, turning towards me, open one eye half way, looking in my direction and trying to lift himself up. I could be reading more into it then there is, but it seems like he knows I am around at least on some level.
He may still have to be intubated again, it all depends on his being able to get enough oxygen. His breathing is still very shallow and he is requiring a lot of supplemental oxygen at times. But, for those of you who know what this means, his last blood gas looked good. If not, look it up:) that is your assignment:)
So, as for his prognosis:
We still don't know a lot. When it comes to adult brains and injury regeneration is not possible. What recovery from this type of injury requires is a rewiring of the brain. The hope is that because of the plasticity of the brain healthy parts of the brain can compensate for the damaged parts. We won't know what deficits Liam will have until he is more awake, it's not something they can tell from a scan. For now we focus on the fact that he is recovering faster then expected, doing better then expected, and is moving in the right direction. I think it was Joel who came up with the perfect description for what his recovery will look like "an upward trending roller coaster." There will be ups and down, but what were are looking for is a general upward trend, and so far that is what we are seeing. The surgeon explained to me yesterday that it's very important not to get hung up on his minute to minute changes. I have been following every little change and that has been very stressful. He explained that the important thing is the overall trend and that setbacks are normal.
Thanks for waiting for this post, I was so exhausted yesterday,and by the time we finally talked to the doctor I was not functioning well - Tyler and Kiea forced me to go home and Tyler prescribed some ambien, so I actually got 8 1/2 hours of much needed sleep. It's hard leaving him here, I feel like I am abandoning him, even though know I am doing the right thing since I can't take care of him if I am exhausted or sick. I just want to tell everyone who has been hanging on here or sleeping here thanks. Being alone is hard, and having someone else helps distract me. Also, I can't tell you how much easier it is to leave and get a nap or a shower if I know someone who cares about Liam is sitting here just in case. When one of you is here, I feel like it's okay to get a way for a couple of hours and take care of me. Thanks.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
breathing on his own!!! (but with the ventilator still in)
Like the title says, he is breathing on his own! The ventilator is still in, but it's off right now and he is breathing well and looks very peaceful. Also, his left arm has been trying to reach for the ventilator tube, his left leg has been bending and lifting of the bed, these are big improvements in hsi movement. He also opened an eye part way earlier. It's so exciting to see him breathing by himself. I know it's still going to be a long road, and it's not like he's going to wake up all of the sudden, but the little improvements are just so reassuring!! I'll let you all know the results of the trial and if they are going to extubate him.
Oh by the way, I got accepted to John Hopkins yesterday to the Masters of Public Health in Epidemiology!!!!! I don't know if I will be able to start in July, but just getting is great news, which I need right now. Maybe next year :)
Oh by the way, I got accepted to John Hopkins yesterday to the Masters of Public Health in Epidemiology!!!!! I don't know if I will be able to start in July, but just getting is great news, which I need right now. Maybe next year :)
End of Day 3
Good Morning! As I mentioned the sensor is out and everyone can see the sharp haircut they gave him in the ER when they put the thing in :) He had the MRI last night about 1am. They will have a family conference with us later today to discuss the results. They are planning to do an SBT today. From what I understand that basically means they set the ventilator so that the breathing is up to him and then check to see what his respiratory rate is, see if he takes deep enough breaths and other things. If it's good, then they will extubate him, if it's not then well try again tomorrow. Just the idea that they are considering it is very positive.
They had the sedative off completely this morning, and he moves a lot, but isn't really awake. I want to make sure you all understands that even once he is extubated and not sedated he is not going to just wake up all of the sudden. It's still going to take a bunch of time and it will occur slowly. They will be looking for some responses first like holding up fingers ect. He has crossed his legs attempting to get comfortable which is a good sign.
Tonights nurse had a good idea, for anyone that isn't able to be here, if you want I can put you on speaker phone and you can talk to Liam. He can't respond of course, but if you want to talk to him so he can hear your voice it's an option.
I will post more later when we have heard about the MRI results. Just remember, it's going to be a long process......
They had the sedative off completely this morning, and he moves a lot, but isn't really awake. I want to make sure you all understands that even once he is extubated and not sedated he is not going to just wake up all of the sudden. It's still going to take a bunch of time and it will occur slowly. They will be looking for some responses first like holding up fingers ect. He has crossed his legs attempting to get comfortable which is a good sign.
Tonights nurse had a good idea, for anyone that isn't able to be here, if you want I can put you on speaker phone and you can talk to Liam. He can't respond of course, but if you want to talk to him so he can hear your voice it's an option.
I will post more later when we have heard about the MRI results. Just remember, it's going to be a long process......
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
How it happened and where we are now
Disclaimer: I wasn't there, but this is what all the guys have told me: Liam was playing at his Sunday morning men's leauge game (2/22/09) and went up for a header. He and the guy from the other team both missed the ball, but cracked skulls. Liam was unconscious before he hit the ground (when he hit his head again, and broke a tooth). He stayed unconscious and the medics were called. They had to intubate him on the field and his breathing wasn't normal and then brought him to the emergency room.
His CT scan showed that his brain was swelling so they put a a tiny sensor through his skull to measure the pressure continuously where the impact was. It looks scary - put the piece in his skull is only the thickness of a pin. He also has a small amount of bleeding in his brain stem, probably from the force of his head jerking back and forth during the impact. He has diffuse axonal injury - basically his brain rubbed against his rought skull and against it self - it's scraped up like when you scrape you knee. After he was stable they moved him to the Neuro ICU. He has been there ever since. He is on a ventilator and he is heavily sedated, which go hand-in-hand. He needs to be sedated to keep his brain calm and not aggravate the swelling. If he's sedated he needs the ventilator to keep his breathing normal because when he is sedated it affects his breathing. They did a a dopler something or another ultrasound of his head the first morning and the swelling had actually gone done a tiny bit, which is awesome. It doesnt' mean it can't still get worse, but it's a good sign. They do a CT scan every night about 4am. Tonight they will remove the sensor because his pressure has been very stable! That's a really good thing. They will also do the first MRI. They wait till a couple days in so that they damage has spread to it's fullest extent so they can get a real picture of what's going on. The doctors said the MRI results won't change how they are treating him, but it will let us see what kind of tissue damage has occured, how extensive it is and what kind of bleeding there is. So, the summary is, he is stable. We will hopefully know more tomorrow. Hopefully he will keep improving and they will be able to wean him off the sedation and ventilator in the next couple of days. Granted, we don't know what's to come, but everything is encouraging right now.
Thanks so much to everyone for everything. I don't know where to start, but you all know who you are and what you have done. The support is amazing and thanks for taking care of everything so I don't have to. Sorry to everyone that I haven't been able to call back and that I haven't talked to personally. I know you understand:) We will all post things on here to that you can all just check this so I don't worry that someone hasn't heard the updates. I'll try to post after morning rounds, and who ever else is here will post also.
Erika
His CT scan showed that his brain was swelling so they put a a tiny sensor through his skull to measure the pressure continuously where the impact was. It looks scary - put the piece in his skull is only the thickness of a pin. He also has a small amount of bleeding in his brain stem, probably from the force of his head jerking back and forth during the impact. He has diffuse axonal injury - basically his brain rubbed against his rought skull and against it self - it's scraped up like when you scrape you knee. After he was stable they moved him to the Neuro ICU. He has been there ever since. He is on a ventilator and he is heavily sedated, which go hand-in-hand. He needs to be sedated to keep his brain calm and not aggravate the swelling. If he's sedated he needs the ventilator to keep his breathing normal because when he is sedated it affects his breathing. They did a a dopler something or another ultrasound of his head the first morning and the swelling had actually gone done a tiny bit, which is awesome. It doesnt' mean it can't still get worse, but it's a good sign. They do a CT scan every night about 4am. Tonight they will remove the sensor because his pressure has been very stable! That's a really good thing. They will also do the first MRI. They wait till a couple days in so that they damage has spread to it's fullest extent so they can get a real picture of what's going on. The doctors said the MRI results won't change how they are treating him, but it will let us see what kind of tissue damage has occured, how extensive it is and what kind of bleeding there is. So, the summary is, he is stable. We will hopefully know more tomorrow. Hopefully he will keep improving and they will be able to wean him off the sedation and ventilator in the next couple of days. Granted, we don't know what's to come, but everything is encouraging right now.
Thanks so much to everyone for everything. I don't know where to start, but you all know who you are and what you have done. The support is amazing and thanks for taking care of everything so I don't have to. Sorry to everyone that I haven't been able to call back and that I haven't talked to personally. I know you understand:) We will all post things on here to that you can all just check this so I don't worry that someone hasn't heard the updates. I'll try to post after morning rounds, and who ever else is here will post also.
Erika
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